If ever there was a blow crippling to me as a person, this was it.

I am not still standing, but I did get back up.

We've just seen a change in the wind & we know the mother of all storms is coming to scatter what's left behind into the wind, rain and lightning.

The time came when we all asked ourselves and each other what just happened and what is about to happen. I've had the time to come to terms with some, but not all of it. What I now have to do is plan and execute the end game.

It's premature, but I can't stay here without being sunk into the hollow life we all are stuck in here and without reliving and remembering all of her last moments, in which I was here, right where I was needed but could do nothing.

So long as I'm here, I'll remember watching the most precious being and only true source of pure love in my life run away quickly.

So, I'm afraid, I have to go. If it ever was, this place is no longer my home. I'm reasonably certain she would've wanted me to go and be happy, like I showed her I was when I did exactly that, this last year.

The greatest consolation is that I do not have to wonder, whatsoever, where my mom went. She went to the place where I sent her, and wrote back to tell us all, in her own way.

Of that I am both unnerved and relieved.